Tanveer Sait Appointed Minister of Porn, Sunny Leone To Be His Deputy

Tanveer Sait is caught watching Porno. His brilliant argument turns a calamity into an opportunity and he gets an exclusive ministry.

Tanveer Sait, the Karnataka Minister for primary & secondary education and minority affairs, was sitting in his mansion, holding his head in his hands. Just then his PRO, Porno Chandra Das, walked in.

“How bad is it outside?”
“There are more than 200 media persons outside – from the print, electronic as well as the social media.”

“What do they want?”
“They want an explanation. Why were you watching porn while attending the Tipu Sultan Jayanti celebrations?”

“What should I tell them Porno?”
“Let me think boss!” Porno declared pacing the room.

Congress Minister in Karnataka educating himself about Pornographic knowledge.
Congress Minister in Karnataka Tanveer Sait educating himself about Pornography.

“You know boss you are really in the blue, I mean red. An organisation called Lashkare Tipu has sprung up from nowhere. It has issued a fatwa against you.”
“F…fatwa!”

“Yes. Anyone who gouges your eyes out will get a place in jannat and 10 lakh rupees in the reverse order.”
“But this is crazy. I never spoke against Tipu Sultan. In fact, keeping an eye on the next elections, I convinced the Chief Minister to celebrate Tipu Sultan Jayanti.”

“All that was great, but you shouldn’t have watched porn during the celebration.”
“What do I do now?”

“I have an idea boss. We’ll call a press conference and you address the media.”
“What should I tell them?”

“India is the land of the Kamasutra, the Khajuraho and the Konark. Sex has always been considered sublime in our culture. However, in the last couple of centuries it has become a dirty word. This has led to repressed desires leading in a steady rise in molestation and rapes. In Scandinavian countries, pornography and prostitution are both legal. As a result there is no suppression of basic needs and hence hardly any incident of rape.”
“But how will all this save my skin?”

“Easy boss, I am coming to that. You will say that there has been a call for introducing sex education in our schools. Now being the Minister for Primary and Secondary Education you were educating yourself as to what kind of sex education should be imparted to youngsters.”
Tanveer Sait’s face lit up. “That sounds like a good idea.”

“Besides, you will also declare, ‘I want to propose that both pornography and prostitution should become legal. This will help in promoting a cottage industry apart from of course finding a release for pent up frustration. In the beginning we should introduce soft porn and later hard porn. Sitting in the celebration I was merely surfing the sites to sift the soft from the hard. My intention was entirely noble.”

Tanveer jumped up and hugged Porno.

“You are a genius.”

***
6 months later Karnataka CM made an announcement, “Tanveer Sait is the new Minister for Porn. He deputy is Sunny Leone.”

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Ramendra Kumar
About Ramendra Kumar 22 Articles
An award winning writer Ramendra Kumar (Ramen) has 30 books, brought out by well known publishers, to his credit. Ramen's writings have been published in several Indian and foreign languages and included in text books, as well as national and international anthologies. Ramen has also been invited to different fora as an inspirational speaker and storyteller.

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