Asaram To Be Freed, Will Train Delhi Police Handle Women Protesters Better

Asaramji will train Delhi Police to handle women protesters with respect, dignity and without any media furor. In order to facilitate this move, Asaramji will be freed from jail. All charges of rape and molestation will be withdrawn from him.

New Delhi: Clueless on how to handle women protesters amid frequent protests throughout the capital city, Delhi Police has decided to get services from an unexpected person, Spiritual guru Saint Asaram Bapu.

With Bapuji's Ashirwad, incidents like these will be things of the past
With Bapuji’s Ashirwad, incidents like these will now be a thing of the past.

Asaramji will train Delhi Police handle women protesters with respect, dignity  and without any media furor. In order to facilitate this move, Asaramji will be freed from jail. All charges of rape and molestation will be withdrawn from him.

According to our highly placed sources in the home ministry, the decision was taken in a hastily convened meeting by Rajnath Singh.  Delhi Police chief Bheem Sen Bassi and governor Najeeb Jang were also present in the meeting.

“Most of witnesses in his case have either died or soon going to die anyway. What’s the point of keeping him in jail endlessly?” said Home Minister Rajnath Singh. “He is a Hindu spiritual leader and our culture teaches us to respect women. He will train Delhi Police to be ‘soft’ on women and respect them. We’re also considering deploying his son Narayan Sai and Sri Ram Sene chief Pramod Muthalik in a phased manner,”  he further told Teekhi Mirchi.

Sources revealed to Teekhi Mirchi that this move was pushed by none other than India’s own casanova N. D. Tiwari, who had endorsed Rajnath Singh before general elections. It must be noted Teekhi Mirchi was the first to report Asaram and N.D. Tiwari launching their anti-rape party, and this new move may be an attempt to revive political career of both Asaramji and N.D. Tiwari.

Twitter users have welcomed this move, since freeing of Asaram Bapu from jail is sure to stop spams that his followers send to random innocent users using hashtags like #Bail4Bapuji and #iSupportAsaramBapu.

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Jabra
About Jabra 303 Articles
Stupidity and sycophancy are my fuel.

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